Breast feeding is essential for a healthy start. In addition to providing essential fats and nutrients that a newborn cannot get from formula, nursing nurtures the bond on which all other relationships are based?the mother-child bond.

This bond is essential to a child's ability to thrive and cannot be underestimated. Unfortunately in our society, a mother who nurses in public is often scorned. When I was nursing, I acknowledged the puritanical roots of our society and did my best to anticipate my child's needs and feed him before I left the house. However, there were times I had to breastfeed in public. When I did, I learned quickly that people generally reacted in three ways: some people flashed me a knowing smile, some pretended I wasn't there and others curled their lips in disgust as though had personally offended them.

People react to nursing in different ways, depending on their upbringing and their tendency to confuse intimacy with sexuality. I remember a friend who had her first baby two weeks after I had mine and refused to nurse because she insisted it was "gross." Although she didn't realize it, she had revealed her fear of intimacy and her hang-ups about sex. It's tragic that some people (even mothers) confuse nursing with sexuality. Breastfeeding is about responding to a child's dependency needs?the need for a satisfied tummy and the need for physical and emotional closeness in a loud, over-stimulating and often frightening world.

Although the rare woman may take advantage of newly swollen breasts and flaunt them in way that makes even the most accepting among us feel uncomfortable, most nursing mothers are discreet.

Below are some tips for breastfeeding in public:

• Take some deep breaths and relax. When you are relaxed, your milk flows readily and your baby is able to relax and feed. (Babies will often mirror their mother's physical/emotional state. A tense mother makes for a tense baby which can cause indigestion.)

• Find a spot to nurse that affords you the most privacy. Do not attempt to nurse in high traffic areas where people are rushing by. Do your best to find a place that allows you to create a mini sanctuary, even if you have to nurse in your car.

• Buy a nursing blanket that is easy to use and allows you to drape yourself and your baby for privacy. A nursing blanket will shield your baby from harsh lights, sounds and the reactions of others.

• If someone scowls at you, do not respond to them. Doing so will only upset you and your baby. If someone makes a comment, do your best to leave the comment hanging in the air. If you must reply, say something like, "Breast feeding is natural and it is in the best interests of the baby." Say it as though you were simply stating a fact.

• After this person has left the scene, take deep belly breaths to calm your nerves. People can be very opinionated when it comes to breast feeding in public. Remind yourself that you are not going to let an ignorant or insensitive person ruin your day or spoil your child's feeding. Think of all the people in your life who support your choice to nurse and let it go.

• If you simply don't feel comfortable nursing in public, pump your milk and take it with you when you go out in public. Although bottle feeding lacks the intimate connection that breastfeeding affords, your baby is still getting Mother Nature's best. When you return home, make sure your baby's next feeding is at the breast.

 

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